Dear Diary,

It's me again.

I just wanted to let all of my concerned/faithful readers know that I've decided to halt production on my second blog. For now.

I don't know what my plan was with that one, but hate fucking comes to mind when trying to describe my writing.

"Jack rabbit sex, you know, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow."

xoxo

Some Kind of Zing!

After the 5th time of being woken up this morning from dehydration and irritation I realized I was probably going to have a horrible day. Afternoon at least.

I've been in one of those "I'm extremely agitated, borderline aggravated" moods today. And it's only noon thirty. I WAS planning on feeling this way all day long and taking it out on customers like any normal person would.. but in an unforeseen turn of events, my mood has altered for the better. And I'm hoping this feeling lasts.

Mere seconds after I unlocked the door to my work the phone rang. Only further proof of the imminent demise of the days quality. An overly anxious person greets me on the other end of the line. He's nice. A little too nice for my liking, immediately my annoyance is prominent. Whether the gentleman can tell or not, I'm not sure. I make the phone call as short as possible. I put a movie on hold for him, which just so happens to be Pay It Forward. Of course. (Foreshadowing?!) Minutes later an extremely tall man comes in. I'm still in a bad mood but he's obviously gay so I try to be at least semi decent towards the guy. (I'm still looking for my Stanford so I don't wanna burn any bridges. Viva la Gaytion!)

He asks how my day is going and I ponder telling him my whole life story but settle with a "meh" and an "I'm in a bad mood." He looks completely distraught. Like he actually cares about how I'm feeling. Awwwkward. I just look strait down and try to avoid eye contact at all costs. The unpleasant sensation I'm suffering only gets worse as I look at the guy through the corner of my left eye. He starts walking away, phew! He starts walking around the front counter, wtf wtf! What's he going to do!? Stand still Miranda, stand still! Maybe he won't see me. I eventually have to look up at him because he's no more than a foot away from me. The look on his face is the one my mother gave me when I found my birth certificate for the first time and my dreams of having been adopted were crushed. SYMPATHY. Do you KNOW what he does next. He gives me a big fuckin hug. And I'm not talking a quick grope and pat on the back, I received a full on SQUEEZE for at least 15 seconds. I don't like being touched, especially hugged, so the fact that I didn't pull away still baffles me. Surprisingly, after he releases my body from his grip, I don't feel like projectile vomiting up my facon and hashbrowns all over his face. I even feel a little better. Less like killing someone and more like smiling at someone. (Which I quickly do.) He takes his movie, bids a fond farewell and walks out the door.

It took 30 seconds for me to process what just happened. A stranger hugged me. I let him hug me. And it made me feel better. I tell myself to be nicer to others and try to shake my demons for the day. Five minutes and half an Iced Grande Skinny Vanille Latte later he comes back. This time he has a flower in his hand. He sets it on the counter, gives me a big grin and then leaves to continue on his day. (Gotta love the gay romantics.) I want to make one thing perfectly clear here. I have never even received flowers from my ex boyfriend. (The only thing he gave me itched and cost me 65 dollars to get rid of.) The flowers smell delicious and I'm in absolute heaven. I LOVE being given flowers, (blush peonies and jasmine accepted always.) Who in their right mind buys flowers for a stranger because they're having a bad day? I suppose it's something I would love to be able to do for someone but haven't. Yet. He made my day to say the least and I plan on paying it forward.

I'm utterly convinced he's involved in The Random Acts of Kindness Foundation

P.S. My girlfriend and I smoked a doobie last night and fucked with my cat for hours. He loves me no more.

xoxo

Porno on Primetime

Shazam!

I'm thinking that if I want more people to read this then I have to start adding more pictures. Something more visually stimulating, a bunch of naked lesbians hugging maybe? I dunno.. I'm just sayin..

But actually the lesbian picture is relevant, it's a promo picture for the show The L Word on Showtime. I just started watching it since I recently finished Sex and the City (that's a whole other post.) My manager said this is like a homosexual version of SATC set in Los Angeles.. then he added that there was strong nudity and sexual content. SOLD!

The first episode was 2 episodes combined so it was like a movie and I got kinda bored of it. But then last night I watched episodes 3 and 4 and found myself oohing and aahing, it IS actually very good! Apparently it's tres chic to be a lesbian! Sign me up! (My boyfriend doesn't like it AT ALL though, I'm beginning to think he only likes movies/tv shows with dudes in them. He hates SATC AND The L Word! WTF!?)

I started bonding with the characters very quickly, taking sides and talking trash. Alice Pieszecki (played by Leisha Hailey) is my favorite so far, in the beginning I didn't like her, but after the 2nd episode her personality started shining through, beyond the rest of the cast's. And that's saying a lot considering how many damned characters there are. Though there are a ton of different people and various plots, it's not hard to keep track of what everyone's doing, not to mention WHO they're doing.. which is nice.

Five minutes into the first episode I saw 2 vaginas and 4 boobs (cue raised eyebrow).. this is going to be a wonderful show.

Jesus christ, I DOOO sound like a lesbian. Bi-curious maybe ;]

xoxo