Santa Likes To Fuck Fat Chicks In The Ass

Tis the season!

It's Christmas Eve here at the ol' Videorama so naturally I'm the one working. I open tomorrow morning also (that would happen to be Christmas DAY by the way)

I'm rather bored at the time being so I thought, buh loooog! I don't have much to say at the moment though, so I'm just going to tell you my 3 favourite Christmas movies (in no particular order..)

1. Home Alone

I've seen this one so many times that I know all the words by heart. And no, I'm not one of those people that says the lines while watching the movie. I HATE when people do that shit.

2. Elf

CLASSIC! If you don't like this movie then you're not allowed to be my friend. (Zooey!)

3. Badder Santa

I can see what Angelina Jolie saw in Billy Bob. The one liners are rad and so is Thurman.

xoxo

Don't Say A Word

RIP Brittany Murphy

xoxo

Stuck in the Twilight Zone

A couple of months ago a Chipotle opened up right across the street from my work. Seeing as it's kinda my favourite food, this is probably the worst thing that could have happened to me. It's almost as bad as if a Taco Bell had opened up across the street. All I do while at work is stare out the window and envy all the people eating the amazing burritos. I'm quite certain my manager has grown to hate me because all I do is talk about how bad I want it but can't afford it. (I know it's only $5 for a huge burrito but.. I actually don't have ANY money) So I'm forced to sit and salivate.

TODAY however was a different story. I started the day off complaining about how I was craving Chipotle (nothing new) I mentioned it a couple times and then stopped whining about it. Then almost 2 hours later a man comes in with 2 big bags that say CHIPOTLE. He sets one on the counter. Jokingly I ask, "Those for me?" He replies with a "Yes" I'm confused at first but then he tells us he's the general manager and decided to bring us some burritos. At this point I'm freaking the fuck out. He gives us the bags and right before he leaves he says "Hope you like pork." I stand there and my manager looks at me and just laughs. ...I'm a vegetarian...

I get so upset I pop a vicodin and think twice about taking another. I was already in a foul mood and this didn't help whatsoever. I start eating my feelings (saltines and cream cheese) and try not thinking about my crazy bad luck. THEN the worst thing you could possibly imagine happened.

A friend that works at Starbucks (Hey Deneb!) came in with a bag and goes "you guys want a burrito from Chipotle?" I got extremely excited and then found out that it too had meat in it. I nearly cried.

I think Alanis Morissette would have something to say about this situation

Feast on THIS

xoxo


Update: 12/28/09
I caved and finally bought Chipotle before work this morning. And it made me sick and now I'm going to go puke it all up. OF course.

Short & Sweet

I almost drunk blogged. I know.

The other night I was home.. all alone.. watching Alias and then I got drunk. (Yes I get drunk by myself.) ANYWAY, I was pretty deep into the 4th season and all the episodes were really sad (parts of them anyway) aaand I was getting pretty emotional. I mean, I cried 4 episodes strait. Then on the season finale.. boyyy did I bawl. My immediate reaction was to blog about it. It's times like those that makes me thankful I don't have internet at my house.

If I DID have internet..

Me the next morning.

xoxo

If Chunk & Sloth Fucked..

Then you'd have SOME idea of what this customer looks like. Don't get me wrong, I love the uglies but this guy (or should I say young man) has also got the most annoying personality of ALL FUCKING TIME. He calls in constantly, yells into the phone, brings movies up to the counter and says "I wanna buy this" WELL YOU CAN'T FUCKING BUY IT BECAUSE ITS A FUCKING RENTAL!!! I tell him that everytime he comes in, he just doesn't get it. My manager hates this kid too, he is so ridiculous, obnoxious, annoying, disgusting, unpleasant and revolting. THE worst.

You might be like, hey take it easy now! IIIIII don't think so. He just called in and omg.

Our conversation:

Me: Videoramaaaa

Him: What are your new releases that came out Thursday?

Me: Actually it's TUESDAY but the big ones were Terminator Salvation, Paper Heart and Night At The Museum 2
Him: Ok that's it?

Me: Nooo, there are like 20 other ones

Him: Ok well read them off to me then

..I proceed to tell him all the movies that came out..

Him: Ok, do you have The 10th Kingdom?

Me: Yes

Him: Ok, I know I can't buy it but can I pay more and buy it?

Me: WTF! NO!

Him: Ok bye

Tell me the truth, that's annoying as fuck right? I'm not just overreacting? Ok, thank you! I didn't think so.

And he also has a friend that looks like Randall Boggs from Monsters Inc.

I'm on a mission

xoxo